About Me
“You have the same journey as Jesus.”
In January 2015, I was in Trondheim, Norway, deepening my training in EFT, hypnotherapy and regression therapy, together with twenty-five other students/teachers. During one of our sessions I was guided into hypnosis, deeper than I had ever been before. In that stillness, without seeking it, I met my late grandmother, then Jesus and my guardian angel. And God spoke these words to me.
That same evening a new message came, just as calm and just as clear: I was to share what I had received with the whole class. Everything in me resisted. The shame I had carried since childhood told me this was too much, too strange and too immodest to say out loud. But I knew it was the next step. The following day, I stood before the group and shared the message from God.
That was the first yes. Saying yes to the whole journey took me years, and my life since then has been that yes.
The wounded healer
I was born with a hole in my heart. When I was five years old, my heart closed in another way, to survive in a world that felt too heavy. For decades I lived the life I had been programmed to live. I carried my family’s patterns, my own shame and something I did not yet have a word for. Today I call it Weltschmerz, the hidden weight of the world’s pain, felt in the body of a sensitive human being. I carried it for forty years.
Then came the dark night of the soul, the deepest and most uncompromising part of the hero’s journey. Between 2013 and 2018, my family and I were persecuted, and our lives were turned upside down. In the middle of it all, in 2015, my firstborn son Aleksander took his own life. He carried the same Weltschmerz I had carried, and for him it became too heavy to bear.
It was the greatest loss and the deepest grief of my life. Aleksander came to me from the other side, and we have had close contact ever since. But I needed him here. I needed to hold him, to hear his voice in the room and feel him close to me. Contact beyond time is real, but nothing can replace the physical presence of someone we love while we ourselves live in a body.
From 2013 to 2016, my whole life collapsed. I lost my identity, my work and my sense of who I was. Everything was stripped away from me, layer by layer, until there was nothing left to hold on to. I was so desperate that I asked God to let me stop living.
I share this because I know that many people are exactly there right now. If you recognize yourself in these words, I want you to know that this is not the end. It was in that place, with nothing left, that I finally surrendered. And it was surrender, not strength, that carried me through.
On New Year’s Eve 2018, my heart opened completely. It has stayed open ever since.
I do not share this because my story is special. I share it because it is the same journey every human being is invited into, only in my particular form.
What I know now
Christ Consciousness is not a religion. It belongs to no church and no single tradition. It is an inner state, a heart that is radically open and a mind that is balanced and at rest. It is a way of living without unnecessary suffering, because you are anchored in something deeper than whatever happens around you.
From this state, everything changes. Old wounds can heal. Life begins to organize itself around what is true for you. And the life you long for is no longer something far away, but something you begin to create from the inside.
This is not reserved for the chosen. It is waiting for the willing. Everyone can live from it, and that is what all my work is about.
My work
I am a social worker, Gestalt therapist, trauma therapist, EFT therapist, regression therapist and hypnotherapist, and I have completed two shamanic trainings, each lasting two years. Today I work as a field holder and soul integrator. Through ceremonies and initiation programs, I hold space for those who are ready to say yes to their soul’s task and to live from their own divine source.
I write books about consciousness, healing and the human journey, among them The Many Faces of Christ Consciousness and Weltschmerz. I host the Divine Design Podcast, and I create music meant to awaken the divine light within us.
Where I live
I am the mother of five adult children, and I live at 69 degrees north in Norway. Here the long winter darkness and the endless summer light have taught me what this whole journey is about: the light was never gone. It was only waiting to be seen.
Begin your own journey
Two of my books were born at the same time, as two sides of the same cause.
Weltschmerz: The Hidden Weight We All Carry, and How It Takes Lives gives words to the pain so many of us feel but cannot name. It is the weight I carried for forty years, and the weight that took my son’s life. The first seven chapters are shared freely for everyone.
The Many Faces of Christ Consciousness: The Architecture of Divinity shows the way through it, back to the open heart and the divine source within. The first five chapters are shared freely for everyone.
If something in these words touches you, you are welcome to begin with either of them. Start where your heart leads you.
Read the first 7 chapters of Weltschmerz free
Read the first 5 chapters of The Many Faces of Christ Consciousness free
If you are carrying thoughts of not wanting to live, please reach out to someone today. You can find a helpline near you at findahelpline.com. You are not alone.
